Okay, so, this blog is a little out dated, so I created a new one. I dont have anything on it really, but mark it and be sure to check back on it!

http://afwifeadventure.blogdrive.com/   

Well, I just felt I owed everyone an update on my life, plain and simple. Well, Christmas is just a few days away. I'm really not excited or thrilled about it. But Jonathan is coming home in a month, and that makes me VERY excited, and our wedding is just over a month away, making me even mroe excited. Replies are coming in, looking like the numbers will be just right with our families and closest, closest friends.  My tan is slowly becoming darker and my teeth whiter haha...Our main priority right now is Jonathan writing his autobiography for our church stuff, and compiling the music wish lsit. I also have bridal pics next week, so that'll be fun. Otherwise it's all done.

In other news, if you hadn't noticed, i graduated last Friday from college, wahoo... I just recently finished watching Season 4 of "24" and I'm waiting for Jon's return to watch Season 5 with him. Now that I'm caught up, I've been bored. I need to pick up a book and start to read. I just got new glasses and really like them and I'm wearing them more than contacts lately.  I recently joined some online groups/forums about NFP and being a military wife and I'm really enjoying them and finding them helpful... I've got babyitis, but we WILL avoid that for a least a year haha...I've been working a lot, but not making a whole lot in tips (waitressing) but it's okay because I will be done there in less than a month. I just seriously cannot believe how fast time has flown! It seems like just yesterday Jon left, and it was 3 1/2 months ago. That's encouraging.

On the spiritual side of life, God is constantly amazing me and showing me so much. I'm beginning to understand, i think, what his will is for my life, spiritually.  It's jsut a long, slow process. It's something I'm excited about, but cannot explain. It's something that I want to share, but really cant. But each day that He shows me something, I get excitement, an excitement I dont think anyone else can really understand.

And the other thing that's amazing me is how much MORE I'm falling in love with Jonathan. I have to thank God for the blessings in my life. I've heard that planning a wedding is a very stressful time, especially between the couples. Our "fight" of the wedding was over whether or not we needed an electric can opener haha!  We aren't fighting, rather falling more in love! I guess it's the old saying "distance makes the heart grow fonder..." And it's soooo true! I cannot wait until the day he becomes my dear husband and I become his wife!!!

Anyway, I guess that's my update on life in a nutshell. Keep me in your prayers if you will, as the wedding is getting closer, and as I need to begin to look for a PUBLIC RELATIONS job in SC- WAHOO! FINALLY GET TO DO PR WORK!!! YAY! ANyway, peace and love, and uhh... goodnight at 1 am heheee. ::MUAH!::      

Somedays, Jonathan being gone are okay, no big deal, I can handle them. Others, it's unbearable... I made it through most of the day, just really missing him, but now, I can't stop crying. It's something I try to hide. I only do it in my room or when no one else is home or when i'm driving. I want to be a "strong military wife" but it's so hard. I've read that they are the "silent ranks" and it's true. And it sucks because people try and comfort you by saying "I understand" and unless they have to deal with it, they dont... Like the song on myspace, "Come Home Soon" by Shedaisy, i just lsitened to it, and it was a stream of tears. Right now, i'm just longing to lay with him under a warm blanket and just cuddle and fall asleep in each others arms. Not even a kiss, just his embrace.  i'm so glad now that we changed our wedding date. I know upon his return, I never want to be without him again, even if it was for just another 3 months until our original wedding date, i'd say no. i know he'll have more deployments and idk how i'll handle them, with God and his strength I guess, but sometimes, honestly, that just feels like it's lacking.. or maybe God's just allowing me to feel emotion regarding it all. I dont know! It's all just so hard sometimes. :'(

Well, I'm exhausted, as always any more. I worked all weekend, had Tues off and babysat all day, then I got to go see Vivian and lil Owen- he's so cute! then worked wed. and I was suppose to have today off, but got called at 8:15 wondering where i was- apparently i was on the schedule, but i didnt know it, so rushed in. Now, i'm sitting here, outta the shower bumming in my pjs already. My aunt I live with opened a reslae shop and so I've been trying to help them a LOT, with the kids and all, so i tend to babysit Tues and Thurs mornings and i'm here with the kids in the evenings usually... So, i'm about to go fix dinner and send them to bed by 8 and maybe watch Flight 93, but we'll see... Aside from that, nothing new with wedding plans. I'm just taking a break in a way, and paying for things as I go.  I miss JOnathan sooooo much that I can't even describe it anymore. I guess to say I feel empty, like something's missing would be a start. I still try and tell him everything like normal, but having to type it all out insted of just spit it all out makes it very difficult. Plus, we're about to have a time change and they dont have that, so i have to remember that there will be an ADDITIONAL hour difference between us, so we'll be able to talk a lot less :( Sometimes thigns seem so impossible. Aside from that, i'm trying to read Captivating again and it's real weird reading it when preparing for marriage rather than when single w/ no prospects haha... It's great though. I'm really hoping that it will help me. Anyway, just a brief update. I'm out.